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Post by inmymanicpanic on Oct 11, 2010 2:42:22 GMT
Im not sure if im gay, bi, or whatever. Im 18 and from what i can remember i was always attracted to both girls and guys. In the last year ive noticed im no longer attracted to sex or intimacy of any kind with men, beyond just some emotional attachment. Now I find myself looking at women and being attracted to them in more than a friends way. Girls always hit on me but i was always scared when it happend for fear of what others would think of me. people jokingly call me gay all the time and im afraid they will leave me or be uncomfortable around me if i said anything. truthfully i dont fully know if im gay or not i just dont want to be miserably confused anymore.
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Post by inmymanicpanic on Oct 12, 2010 6:10:47 GMT
so ive been talking about this with two of my close friends. one of them is bi sexual the other is gay. I realise now what matters more. being happy or trying to make others happy. Ive come to a conclusion that im either bi or lesbian. It doesnt matter to me which one, as long as i am comfortable and honest with myself. I went on a date with a man this week, no chemestry at all, no anything at all, most of all i was turned off by the idea of being with a man. i went on a date with a girl this week and i felt somthing i hadnt in a long time. There was chemestry. ive continued to see this person and every time things grow more and more powerful. once i got over the initial oh my god moment i didnt care what people thought, i was happy, i am happy. Who knows if things will change but, for the time being im fine with the way things are. not to say theres still not some struggle and pain associated with inner conflict, friends, and family, most of whom dont know yet.
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xenalin
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Post by xenalin on Oct 12, 2010 20:48:20 GMT
That sounds great  Accepting yourself for who you are is always the first and biggest step to make in my opinion. I'm kind of in the same dilemma, I don't know if I'm gay or bi, or just in love with the thought of being gay or bi, since living as a straight hasn't done well for me at all. |
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Post by inmymanicpanic on Oct 13, 2010 12:16:10 GMT
I had a little bit of a set back today, though. My father was in town and decided it would be a good idea to look throught my phone. he's a real racist and bigot. 10 minutes later and an offical un invite to his wedding, i didnt know what to do with myself. I still think im hurt by it but he is who he is and i know i dont have to please someone who will never be happy.
on the good side, my friends for the most part have been supportive, unbelievably supportive.
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xenalin
New Member
Come rain or come shine
Posts: 39
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Post by xenalin on Oct 13, 2010 17:00:09 GMT
That sounds great, about the friends I mean Family doesn't always have to be by blood you know. Sometimes .. friends can be family. |
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Accepting yourself for who you are is always the first and biggest step to make in my opinion. 